Today is egg retrieval day. And I have so many emotions about those words. Infertility is hard. IVF is hard. But doing IVF because chemotherapy is about to start is hard in a completely different way. This cycle wasn’t planned. The timing was forced. Nothing about it happened according to the ideal timing or necessarily…
I woke up angry this week. Not sad. Not numb. Not even particularly scared in that moment. Just angry. The last two weeks have felt like a roller coaster, and I’m never sure which emotion is going to show up next. The first week, I was devastated. Shocked. Angry at times, but mostly just trying…
There are moments in this journey that feel impossibly heavy. Today was one of them. Today was my CT scan. I’ve learned more about colorectal cancer in the last week than I ever wanted to know. A friend who works in oncology gently prepared me for what today’s scan was looking for. She explained that…
I’m an Enneagram 1. I like plans. I like order. I like knowing what’s coming next. When Brian deployed, I had a picture in my mind of what this year would look like. It wasn’t the year I wanted for our family, but I had made peace with it. I would spend my days with…